Tag: love

Yell, laugh, cry, scream, fight, or love

I will share something with you. Sometimes when I think about everything I get a heavy feeling in my heart. I think it could easily be mistaken for depression or despair. But it’s not. It’s the will to live, the passion I have for life beyond this reality I’ve set for myself.

It’s like a fire that burns inside of me, and I am not exactly sure how to release it or what’s the best outlet for it. It’s a combination of every emotion – I don’t know if I want to yell, laugh, cry, scream, fight, or love.

If you want to see what I am talking about, it will be easy to see it if you are a dog owner. Go grab the leash and walk over to your door or gate and just stand there. Your dog will be there waiting, I am sure of it, with that look in their eyes and suspense in their voices as they yap for you to hurry up. That is how I feel. Just how that dog wants to get out there and smell it all, taste the world, feel the wind on his face as he runs. More than anything I want to live my my life and be able to appreciate every little thing.

Peace ~ Magnum

Thank you for reaching out

Thank you to everyone who has commented on this blog site. I have received your messages and I want you to know that you all help me more than you can imagine. I have never been complimented on my thoughts so much. I always thought that what I had to say didn’t have any worth, but you all are helping me to believe in myself and my recovery.

To everyone who is struggling with drugs or who knows and loves somebody who is suffering, I want to let you know that even when things seem at their lowest, things can and do get better. I am in jail, headed to prison, some might consider this a low point in my life but my lowest was when I was out on the street using and feeling so much shame. Now I feel I am growing.

If any of you would like to write me a personal letter I would be happy to receive it and read what you have to say and learn what your story is. I truly believe that recovery cannot be done alone so let’s do it together and grow.

My whole life I have always been a giver, sometimes giving the wrong things and in the wrong ways, but I have always wanted to help when I saw someone needed something. Now I know that with a little kindness and an open heart I can help others and help myself too.

Peace, Love and Noodles ~ Magnum