Tag: addiction

When a Recovering Addict and Ex-Con Needs Medical Help

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I have been sick lately. It turns out I have Chronic Neurological Lyme disease that is raising all kinds of hell with me. I have been really pretty damn sick with this, and I have been in pain and stressed out. I have made the rounds to quite a few doctors and I have made a grim discovery. When you are a person that looks a certain way, when you are a person who has a certain history, when you are a person who is open and forthright with doctors about things you have experienced in life – you are

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4th of July, 2015 – Can you find freedom while in prison?

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For those of you with family and loved ones in prison on this 4th of July holiday weekend, especially those imprisoned for crimes of drug use, I will tell you this – freedom is a state of mind. A person can be more free while incarcerated than they ever were on the outside. When I was going through real bad times with drug use I was not free. Sure, maybe I could jump in my truck and drive to a party on the 4th, drink some beer and eat some barbecue and that is so-called freedom, compared to being locked

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Getting clean the hard way

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Maybe a few of you reading this blog stumbled on here when you were looking for information about heroin or addiction. Maybe you or one of your family members is struggling with some of the very same things that got me here in prison and you are looking for help. In one of my first posts on here, I said I was genuinely glad I got arrested because it probably saved my life. Getting locked up is what it took for me to get the needle out of my arm. That is the good news. Now the bad news. Here is the

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Letting go

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I’m mad. I’m anxious. I’m just all around worried. I sit here and sit here and sit here. And I go over and over how I could have lived my life different. I know I could have done better. I am scared for my future. All these thoughts bring nothing but negative emotions and urges. I feel like starting a fight with anyone who crosses me, I have the urge to use drugs, drink, shoot up. And I find myself judging others, in an attempt to defend my actions and outbursts and bad attitude. I know at moments like this,

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A fellow inmate reaches out

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Today is the 17th of November, and it is a great day! The reason it is such a great day is that last night a fellow prisoner here at the county jail reached out. For the sake of this post, I am going to call him “Ali”. Ali and I were  just sitting around, and laughing with the guys. Anyway, I went back over to my bunk, deciding to call it a night. I was just getting ready to go to sleep, when Ali surprises me by saying “Man, it suck’s that you’re leaving already.” At first I was a

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